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Arse Bandits Play to Full House, Three Dead.

The Arse Bandits played their first ever show in Bangalore yesterday. In a surprising overturning of convention, the nice restaurant that played host to them allowed dancing on the table-tops, even though use of proper cutlery remained mandatory: by the time the Bandits set folded up, several small riots had broken out all over the city, and reports of fires and looting are trickling in as I write this piece. V. Shivalingam, the whimsical tyrant who formed, and currently lords over, the band claimed he was “satisfied” with this outcome. The show’s organisers were last seen being rolled into an ambulance belonging to the Sri Basaveshwara Home for Spastics and Mental Cases. The ambulance is said to have crashed over a cliff on its way there.

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